Wednesday, September 24, 2008

My Baby Buddy

At work I was excited these last couple weeks. There was a seamstress who was pregnant as well and she was my baby buddy. Early in my shift I went to visit her and she told me she was going to the doctor because she had been spotting and had a lot of cramps. I of course told her that it was possibly just implantation bleeding and the cramps I think are normal.

After a long day at work I learned she had come back from the doctor and had lost her baby. I walked in to the seamstress area and all she had to do was look at me. She had tears in her eyes and just looked drained. She hugged me and told me that she had lost her baby. I told her all the normal things of "It wasn't time, and it will happen when it is right." You know *those* things. She said that she needed to make sure I took it easy and was careful. And that she was at least lucky that she has children already. There were more hugs and tears and me walking away thinking, "What if that was me?". What would I do, what would I say. I mean I know I am still in the scary area. But here we are 5 years after we met and this just came out of the blue. I am not sure what I would do or how I would handle it.

I guess since I have no feelings of being pregnant other than the fact that I am feeling sick sometimes and tired and potty breaks all the time. No bleeding or anything, just hoping it stays that way. I just feel horrible for her and like I shouldn't be excited about being pregnant anymore at work. But at the same time I can't help it either. Just breaks my heart for such a wonderful woman to experience such a hard and horrible time in her life.

1 loving comments, who likes comments?:

spaceyhawks said...

I can totally relate, having been able to keep my baby when two of my sister in laws both lost their babies around the same time. I felt like I couldn't be happy about my baby. But you know life moves forward and I'm sure she doesn't want you to not be happy, this is big for you. So try not to stress over it, and know that everyone that knows you, knows that this is a joyous time for you.